Life · Codependent dynamic

Am I in a Codependent Dynamic?

Taking responsibility for their emotions, losing your own wants, carrying resentment: the codependency patterns that don't look like red flags.

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Codependent dynamic

How responsible do you feel for the other person's emotional state? (1=not at all, 10=entirely) How clear are you on what you actually want — separate from what they want? (1=no idea, 10=very clear) Does the relationship require you to manage their stability? How much resentment do you carry that you don't express? (1=none, 10=a lot) How easy is it to say no to this person? How much of your own plans, interests, or friendships have you set aside for this relationship? (1=none, 10=most of them)

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Answer questions about emotional responsibility, your own needs clarity, and what you've set aside. Podge scores the pattern.

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Am I in a Codependent Dynamic?

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What this means

This instrument starts blank so it does not judge a made-up example before you have entered your own situation.

Formula used

Combines emotional responsibility score, own-needs clarity (inversed), stability management, resentment level, difficulty saying no, and life sacrifice into a codependency pattern score.

Worked example

Feeling 8/10 responsible for a partner's mood, having sacrificed most of your own friendships, and finding it almost impossible to say no scores a strong codependent pattern.

Common questions

Is codependency always bad?
Interdependence is normal and healthy. Codependency is a specific pattern where one person consistently overrides their own needs to manage another's emotional state — often unconsciously. The cost is the accumulated resentment and loss of self that follows.

Can this pattern exist outside romantic relationships?
Yes — codependent patterns are common in family relationships (especially with a parent or sibling with addiction or mental health challenges), close friendships, and even work dynamics.

Plain-English summary

Fill in the questions on the left to generate a verdict card.

This section translates the result into a short, direct takeaway rather than leaving the page at a bare number.

Disclaimer: This is a pattern-recognition tool, not a clinical assessment of codependency. A qualified therapist or counsellor can provide a proper evaluation. This is not medical or psychological advice.

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